aka The Frazzled Mom
Let me just say, I’m happily married. I wanted that to be clear before I began this post, because some readers out there might assume I’m jaded by the holiday and therefore have formed the following opinion of it. That isn’t the case.
I do not like Valentine’s Day.
That isn’t to say that I don’t like flowers. I do. Browsing the selection of cut flowers online or taking in the scents of a mixed bouquet in the store is wonderful. And I can’t resist chocolate, good chocolate, not the cheap (aka free) kind you’d get with a tank of gas.
So why don’t I like the holiday? Because every year I witness people rushing around, similar to the Christmas season, searching for a “good enough” gift. Keep in mind, I didn’t say everyone does this. There are some that take time and thoughtfully plan out the day’s events as well as gifts. But for others, who might be busy with work, kids, and, well, life…it may be a last minute dash. And while the sentiment, the idea behind Valentine’s (minus the massacre) is sweet, the holiday from what I’ve seen, has become just another item on the to do list. So flowers, chocolates and whatever else might be deemed a good enough gift are hurriedly bought. It’s the thought that counts, right? I guess…
I’ve been in the office setting and frankly have been appalled by the behavior of some co-workers. When flowers are delivered on that holiday, they actually have compared the size, the number of stems, the estimated cost. As if that is equivalent to the love of the one who ordered them. They sneer, tease or speak behind closed doors regarding others who may have received a single rose or no rose at all. Is this what the holiday has become for some? If yes, then I’m glad I made the decision long ago, before I dated my husband, to never celebrate it.
Here are some examples of what I prefer in lieu of Valentine’s day gifts…
-My husband buys me an iced coffee once a week. Not only that, but he knows exactly what I want, how I want it and what size I want it. In fact, he knows what I typically like at nearly every restaurant we’ve been to and what I really don’t like. He remembers I prefer Coke not Pepsi.
-My husband will take the kids to a playground to give me time at home. If I am exhausted, he keeps the kids away so I can get some rest. If I’m sick, he takes care of me.
-If I want a girls night out with a friend, my husband doesn’t give me a guilt trip. He tells me to go have fun.
-He knows I enjoy reading and watching Sherlock Holmes. Though not his favorite, he will sit and watch it with me anyway.
My point is, it is the little things that I find of more value than a gift on one particular day. Texting “I love you” or “I’m thinking of you”. Offering a hug or just sitting with someone who needs comforting. And, don’t laugh…doing the dishes or laundry. For me, these little acts of love speak volumes above a bouquet of flowers that will wither away in a week.