The Consulting Writer

aka The Frazzled Mom

A is for Alien, At a Quarter to Three

Makin’ Aliens Since 2008

I awoke around 2 am to the sound of running water. Rising unsteadily from my bed, I noticed a light emanating from the other room. Stumbling out into the hallway, I discovered that the light was, in fact, coming from the guest bathroom. I slowly opened the door. It took a minute to process the scene.

My 3 year old son, having been unable to sleep, and fearful of waking his mother and incurring her wrath, had decided to play quietly in the bathroom. Using the 4 pound container of Bag Balm (not the little green can) that was located under the sink counter, he had proceeded to “paint” the bathroom in the caramel colored goo.

When I asked him why he would do that (a silly question to ask any young child), this is the answer I received…

“Mom, I wanted to look like an alien,” he replied in a spooky sounding voice while he wiggled his goo covered fingers in the air. A smile on his face.

With a sigh, I proceed to clean up my son and put him to bed. It took a while. Bag Balm is a great product for the skin, but not for anything else. I return to the bathroom where I began to clean up the remainder of the goo. There was goo on the sink, the faucets, the mirror, the floor, the toilet handle and toilet seat and the walls. How those areas were going to make him look like an alien was beyond me. And, at 2am, I was anything but amused.

Of course, after the fact, and now that I’ve had plenty of sleep, it makes me laugh.

After searching the Internet, I’ve discovered that my son isn’t the first, nor will he be the last when it comes to using bag balm “off label”. And as other mom’s have noted, unless it is for use on the skin, it is really, REALLY, challenging to clean up.

7 comments on “A is for Alien, At a Quarter to Three

  1. kristin
    April 1, 2015

    I used to use bag balm when I was milking dairy goats back in the 1970s but I had never thought of using it as a skin cream. Now I have to read “The Wonders of Bag Balm”.


    • Elizabeth Los
      April 1, 2015

      I’m a city girl with country relatives. 😉
      I’ve given bag balm to friends with eczema because it helps a lot. I personally use it in the winter months when my hands are really dry. My kids both ask for it when they have spots of dry skin. It clears it up in about a day. Gone are the days of diaper rash, but I still keep a couple containers of bag balm around…just not the 4 pound container!


  2. I admit, I have no idea what bag balm is, but that is a cute story.

    ~Patricia Lynne aka Patricia Josephine~
    Member of C. Lee’s Muffin Commando Squad
    Story Dam
    Patricia Lynne, Indie Author


    • Elizabeth Los
      April 1, 2015

      Bag balm is a caramel colored Vaseline-like product. It’s great for skin, but was originally meant for help with chafing in farm animals, such as when milking cows. That said, it holds up in the elements, making it difficult to simply wash off.


  3. Amy Fahrer
    April 1, 2015

    Looks very similar to the balm we use on our dogs’ feet in the winter. Can’t imagine how tough that was to clean up, but I thank you for the laughs today! 🙂


    • Elizabeth Los
      April 1, 2015

      I’ve never tried it on my dogs. I just might do that next time around! It was tough to clean up, especially the bathroom surfaces.


  4. KAT Writer
    April 3, 2015

    I love the story. Thanks for sharing. My daughter made a bath in the sink for her doll out of toothpaste and somehow it got everywhere but luckily a tube of toothpaste is only a few ounces. It was not nearly as hard to clean as bag balm.
    I didn’t know it came in such a large quantity.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


This entry was posted on April 1, 2015 by in AtoZ, Daily Ramblings and tagged , .
Follow The Consulting Writer on

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 1,389 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 15,984 hits
I review for BookLook Bloggers
I review for BethanyHouse
I review for Blogging For Books


A Song Unheard
Fire and Bone
Why I Hate Green Beans: And Other Confessions about Relationships, Reality TV, and How We See Ourselves
%d bloggers like this: