aka The Frazzled Mom
The car doors slammed as two detectives stepped out to the wooded area. Leaves crunched under their gumshoes with each step. The yellow tape waved in the wind as if to say, ‘Over here!’ They flashed their badges to the officer managing the crime scene.
“Detectives Ash and Fir.”
The officer nodded, allowing them admittance under the barrier.
“Wood you believe it?” the red-headed detective asked while looking at the fallen tree. “Out here, and not one witness?”
His partner shook his head. “None. Apparently, no one heard him fall.”
“I just can’t beleaf we’ve got nothing to go on,” the man replied, running fingers through his brown hair.
“Oaky doke. Was anyone pining for him? Or jealous? Was he poplar with the ladies?”
The guy just stared at his associate.
“What? Clearly, this is a case of adultree gone bad.”
“Yew board or somethin’? What evidence supports that theory? Do we know anything about him? Maybe he committed treeson. We need to check all branches before coming to any conclusions.”
Red hair ruffled in the wind as he stared at the dead tree. “Well, I’m stumped,” he said while slipping on a pair of sunglasses.
“According to our chief tech, Bob, he was known for being happy. A real treemendous guy.” He blinked rapidly and turned to wipe his eyes.
“Are you weeping? Don’t get sappy on me. We’ll catch the birch that did it.”
“Nah. Just got some saw dust in my eye. We got no leads. It’s like a nightmare on elm street.”
He scoffed. “You can’t see the forest through the trees. Don’t give up on the case. We’ll seed it through.”
“I guess you’re right, Doug. Who’ve we got for suspects?”
“Well, there’s the mysterious woodchuck laughing maniacally. He gives Myrtle the crepes. The terminate rumored to have recently eaten himself outta house and home. And the beaver who just moved into the area. Neighbors complained of the noise, but he didn’t give a dam.”